Haven’t we all come across the so-called MARRIAGE advice given enthusiastically by our expert friends, families, relatives, and sometimes even outsiders. We as humans are so inclined towards the happenings in other people’s lives that we couldn’t restrain ourselves from offering our expertise on everything.
Marriages are different, and it would be absolute stupidity to consider two marriages to be the same. It would be wrong to expect that what worked for one marriage would work for yours.
Finding a life partner isn’t a big deal. You could easily find your life partner through top-rated popular matrimonial sites in the world. But only if you could close your mind to unsolicited advice could you make your marriage a happy one.
1. Only marriage can bring happiness.
Whom are we kidding? Humans have made their mark on mars, and we still cannot get rid of these age-old notions. Undoubtedly, marriages are beautiful, exceptional, and phenomenal. But is it the only way towards a happy life? No. Just like other crucial decisions in life, marriage is a decision taken by two mature individuals who wish to stay together. As simple as that. One can stay happy being simple, married, or divorced.
We as a society have to give up on notions that say singles cannot stay happy.
2. Marriages are perfect when you find your soul mate.
No marriage is ever perfect. In fact, no human being is perfect. Marriages are beautiful when partners within it understand the differences and value each other. Marriage doesn’t work on their own. It requires constant effort; till the very end to keep it alive.
Besides, who out there knows the definition of a perfect marriage?
3. Arguments are bad for the health of a marriage.
Arguments don’t make for a bad relationship. Unresolved conflicts and buried issues do. Arguments are crucial as long as the motive is to find solutions. The moment it becomes the race of proving oneself, the marriage fails. When two people live with each other, arguments are bound to happen. Correctly addressing such issues is truly a representation of a healthy marriage.
4. Ignore your problems.
Just let go of your problems by not bothering your partner. Like really, how is this advice even healthy?
You see ignoring the problems would only sweep it aside for a time being till it becomes a huge issue. Bottling up your feelings would lead to a dissatisfied and unhappy marriage.
5. Good marriage comes with an ability to read your partner’s mind.
This is one of the worst pieces of advice for sustaining any marriage. Communication is vital for a smooth married life. You see, your partner isn’t a superhuman and nor, are you. You couldn’t peek into their minds and understand what is bothering them. You have to talk it out and find solutions to your problem.
Save yourself from a dissatisfied marriage by not assuming your partner to be a mind reader.
6. Your spouse would complete you.
Marriage isn’t a loss of individuality. Your partner couldn’t make up for your insecurities and fears. You have to work on it. Only when you as an individual would have a strong personality could you add life to your marriage. Your partner cannot complete you. The concept of better half is as vague as this false notion. Marriage is a 100-100 contribution of two individuals who make for an excellent team.
7. Everything would eventually work out.
Marriage requires efforts for sustenance. It doesn’t work out on its own. People need to understand the humongous difference between wedding and marriage. A wedding doesn’t ensure constant marital bliss. It’s the efforts that count. When you put in efforts into your marriage, you prioritize it and ensure that everything eventually works out.
Many times this advice comes from a pure intention of helping you out. But you need to understand that accepting this unsolicited advice as truth could do more harm to your marriage than being beneficial.
I strongly believe that if we keep these wrong perceptions away from our marriage life and implement success in marriage strategies, we would make our marriage a better place. By studying each other’s character and individual differences with the intention of improving on them for the betterment of the marriage would go a long way to change things positively. Nothing in life that is good comes easy. The road to success is not easy. If it were easy. every body would be successful. In the same vein, if success in marriage were that easy every body would have been celebrating marital success. Only those who have understood the principles of marital success and put them into practice end up celebrating.